Lots happening; Still Struggling.

It’s been a couple of weeks, since I last posted. A few of you have sent me emails wondering if I am okay. And, honestly, I’m not quite sure how to answer that.  I’ve been very busy lately, with some changes happening. And, I hate to admit it, but I have not done it with complete sobriety.  I don’t really know where to take off on this post, so I’ll just give a snapshot of what’s going on:

  • Offered a couple of new jobs. One I turned down and one I accepted. I don’t know that it will fulfill me from a professional standpoint, but it comes with a small increase in pay and offers me a better lifestyle. I’ll also get a chance of perspective in the industry I work.
  • My relationship is still struggling and It fluctuates between an on-again, off again teeter-totter.
  • I had plumbing problems in my house and I spent a few days trying to make repairs. I never feel comfortable about my lack of handyman abilities, but I do my best.
  • My sobriety completely sucks. I have been drinking a few beers here and there over the past month. I went about 15 days and then drank a few, stopped a few days, then drank a few, then stopped, then drank, then stopped, etc., etc. Although, I’m currently on my third day without drinking anything, I’m questioning if I am an alcoholic again.
  • I have been really trying to be more active. I started 22 days ago, doing a pushups, squats and lunges on a daily basis. I began with one of each, and added to it each day.  Today, I’ll do 22 pushups, 22 lunges each leg and 22 squats.  I know it’s not much, but I needed to do something physical for a routine.

I don’t really have anything to write about today, but I felt a small update was relevant.

10 thoughts on “Lots happening; Still Struggling.

  1. It sounds hard. I would just assume that if you were an alcoholic and are drinking, that you are still an alcoholic, except if you became miraculously take-it-or-leave-it and sort of left it. Like, I don’t bother to drink, don’t keep drinking if I have one out at a pub, and we have alcohol in the house that has literally been there for decades, and have had years where I’ve had one drink or none, so I would say I am not an alcoholic. If I had been addicted to it, then that would be a different question, since then I would say that my behaviour–and excuses–would bear watching. Good luck with it–our plumbing screwed up too, and I am cranky that I can’t fix it easily myself.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Congratulations on your new job that is fantastic. Hate to break it to you but I think we are alcoholics and are even alcoholics when we aren’t drinking 🙂 a celiac doesn’t stop being a celiac because they stop eating gluten it just is what it is.

    Liked by 1 person

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