Dangerous Time

The title might seem appropriate to the times we're living in due to the Covid-19 pandemic, but it's actually about the fact that I am at a month sober. In fact, tomorrow marks 30 days since I last drank. And it's dangerous for me because I have been here before. I was mentioning to someone …

Obsessive Thoughts Running in the Background

For the past several days, I've had some thoughts obsessing my mind when it's not focused. Honestly, it's something that I go through on a regular basis when I make attempts at sobriety. And I used to handle and accept my actions in the past as blips on my historical timeline. But, as I have …

Strains on Sobriety

Before I really talk about this, I'm going to qualify this by saying I am in early sobriety, so there have not been "real" tests on my sobriety - especially since I chronically relapse on a mere whim - like being in desperate need of a pedicure.  I'm only partially joking...you outta see the claws …

Mountainous Challenges as I Get Into Sobriety

I've always kind have been a a go home or go big kind of person. I don't enjoy the mundane and I prefer to take on tasks or goals that challenge me. I've never been afraid to push myself to my limits for the purpose of pushing the boundaries of those limits for the purpose …

Perfectionism: Or How My Thoughts Spin Out of Control.

Yesterday, I indicated that I wasn't managing my sobriety so well. That's probably an understatement, and today - this morning, especially - I felt my thoughts begin to unravel my emotions. It was a common tactic of Hilda, I'm sure. But I don't want to feel this way, so I am writing this all down, …