Health matters…

I'm typing this at the end of my experience through COVID. Yes, that's correct, I contracted COVID someway and somehow. I don't want to engage in policy matters or the public opinions splitting everyone in two about what should or should not be done about it all. I'm not even going to discuss if I …

Today’s alcoholic thoughts.

Sometimes there are days when I have so much to say, and then there are days like today when I don't really have anything to say - especially about being an alcoholic. What I know today is that I woke up, got on my knees and prayed. Then I began my morning duties for work. …

Panic from low blood sugar…

So, I'm fighting an urge at this moment. My blood glucose level is exactly 63 mg/dL as I write this.  I'm trying not to have a knee-jerk reaction right now. I just took 4 glucose tabs (4g carbohydrate each, for a total of 16 g) to treat the low, as well as a small peanut …

A Small Dip…

I haven't thought about depression in a while...maybe over two weeks now.  I'm not really sure.  I have been trying to focus on things to keep my mind busy, but last night I had a little dip in the mood.  It's one of those things that I notice, because it's usually a strong indicator that …

Choosing how to die versus eating a bowl of ice cream with peanut butter?

***Trigger Warning: Discussing thought of suicide and eating disorders.*** ===================================================================== As I sit here, spoon in hand and pushing a fattening scoop of ice cream smothered with peanut butter into my mouth, a depressing thought came to my mind: "I could pull my infusion set out and no one would know it was intentional..."  You see, …